I'm falling sleep. I don't have any pressing work right now, and I don't want to make coffee because I'm the only one who drinks it and it would go to waste.

Everyone on my MSN list is "Away". Upstairs is still warm from when my boss inexplicably turned up the heat this morning. I started dozing off at my desk so I went to the bathroom to stay away. I stretched all my extremities out and now I'm looking for something to do.

I completely forgot about fireworks. I love fireworks. I went last year with Lisa and we had a great time, though we were paranoid that everyone thought we were lesbians. I'm going tomorrow night though, with Mr. Wonderful, and I can't wait. As I remember, they are usually pretty good. I'll also have to remember to schedule in the end of season fireworks at my parents trailer park. They are not, in the classic sense, as "good" as the ones the city puts on, but they are much more entertaining. It is essentially about half a dozen guys with as much fireworks as $400 will buy. There is usually a drunk fire department volunteer supervising, but usually at least one person finds themselves ablaze.

We are also planning on camping in my parents backyard. For some reason, I find this infinitely funny. I haven't camped in our backyard since I was 10. However, both of our usual dwellings are filled to capacity this week, so desperate times call for desperate measures. They're really "desperate measures" though, I suppose. I think it's going to be hilarious. One could get into a lot of trouble camping in my parents backyard... Especially if one has a house key while the other one doesn't...

Hoorah for alliteration!

Last year, some of you may recall that I posted a few conversations I had with a certain someone who contacted me via my MSN profile. He was an older gentleman, and married, with kids. He proposition me for a rendez-vous, but I declined, citing moral objectives. I posted our conversations, because, well, they were funny. I posted his user name, as well as his hotmail address.

Oops.

Well, Mr. SoandSo send me an email the other day (through the profiles again, curiously enough) saying that "it has come to my attention that our conversation as per blahblah has been posted on a website. Please delete it. Thank you."

It sort of spooked me out at first. I went to delete the blogs but then reconsidered it. Really, this is the Internet. There is some anonymity implicit in Messenger conversations, if you want it to be. Furthermore, he was the one propositioning me, so he's taking a risk. I'm sure it wasn't the first time he propositioned anyone, so he's really taking many risks and being very trusting. For all he knew, I could have figured out who he was when he sent his picture and blown his cover.

Anyway. I didn't delete the posts. It's my blog and I have a right to post what I want. I did, however, remove any mention of his email or username. It was much more work than simply hitting "delete", but at least now my principles are still intact.

I'm feeling pretty good right now. I just finished a project I've been working on the past week. It's a parenting workshop on how to talk to your kids about sex. Seeing as how I'm not a parent, nor do I have experience talking to small kids about sex, I think the workshop looks pretty good. Granted, the proof is in the pudding - we'll see if it's a success or not when I actually run the program. If anyone comes.

Plans are in the works to work with my dear old friends at UW again for a day in July. Scheduling has been a problem, as is my fee, but we'll see. I'll be making a special trip for them, and I'm trying to get my travelling expenses as well as my usual hourly wage. I won't get it, but at least I tried.

I had a fairly decent weekend. I went to Halifax on Saturday, to do my usual financial errands. I also dropped a roll of film off to Carsand Mosher. Turns out they didn't turn out: Proabably because the roll went throught washing machine. Hm. I just checked my messages and they're going to send the prints to me anyway, free of charge, which is nice.

Oh, update on UW. Apparently, I'm doing a bit better, negotiation wise. I can't really say what it is, but if you really want to know, email me.

Work is almost done for the day. Two more days until I'm back home. I wasn't planning on coming home originally, but I am now, and I'm glad I am. I've been in this strange headspace lately, so I think this will do me good. Also, I'm bringing Sexy down with me, and she'll be getting fixed. As I put it this morning to one of my co-workers "It's bad enough having one female in heat in my house..". She'll probably hate me, and all this trust we have will vanish, but damned if I have a litter of kittens to deal with. I ain't gonna be no single momma. At least, to kittens.

My mood has lifted a bit this afternoon. I've had lots of coffee, and gave the summer student some of my work. Ha!

I always fine the most interesting things while I'm researching things for work. I'm always learning new things. I found this article this afternoon, and thought some tips were rather interesting, if not particularly useful. Hence, I bring you highlights from 69 incredible sex tricks, along with my own commentary:

3. Have your man sit on top of the washing machine while you have sex (you perched on top, with your legs wrapped around his waist). The vibrations carry through his penis, turning it into a wonderful vibrator. Select the cottons cycle for the best results. It's a warm wash so his bum won't get cold, plus it has the longest, fastest spin. Feel those good vibrations.

I like how they specified what type of cycle to use. I don't have this option on my particular machine. But I do have "soft", "regular", and "strong". When it's set on strong, the whole thing shakes and starts walking around the kitchen.

12. Feed your man cinnamon, cardamom, peppermint and lemon if you're planning to give him oral pleasure. It'll make his semen taste nicer.

I knew that vegetarians generally tasted better than meat eaters, but it's nice to know that there are particular foods that make 'dining at the Y' a little more palatable.

17. Have sex on a swivel chair to make sex really exciting. 'The spinning sends fluid rushing around the balance mechanism in your inner ear,' says Men's Health medical editor Dr Keith Hopcroft, and this disorientation makes you feel like you're floating. Get ready to land on Cloud 9.

I love office chairs. I spin and race mine around all day. I've actually stripped the paint off the floor. I think maybe that's why I'm attracted to business men in suits.

23. Make oral sex better for you and for him with some ice cream. But don't just spoon it on - buy an ice cream cone, bite off the end and slip it over his still-soft penis. Now add the ice cream and take your time nibbling and licking until he's so hard that he breaks out of the cone! Who ever said ice cream was just for kids.

Hm. I'm not so sure about this one. First of all, I really don't think that an ice cream cone would fit over a flaccid penis - or maybe I'm just lucky. \m/.

29. Forget the old sex and chocolate recommendations - cheese contains more phenylethylamine, the chemical that gives you that chocolate 'high'. So order a cheese platter after dinner and see if doesn't get you both in the mood.

This one I could get into. Cheese and sex. Hmm.. I think I just thought of a new use for Swiss Cheese....

32. Eat avocado to get in the mood for love. It's loaded with the feel-good, pleasure-intensifying substance, phenylethylamine.

Another sexy food I knew nothing about. I am *so* making nachos tonight with guacamole and extra cheese.

33. Take a swig of champagne before going down on him. Keep it in your mouths by creating a 'seal' with your lips, then use your tongues to swirl the bubbles around the head of his penis. Nerve endings react to the bubbles, heightening sensation, and when he's suitably satisfied he can do the same for you.

I guess I'm pretty ignorant when it comes to food & sex. Sometimes I hold Coke in my mouth because I like the sensation, so I imagine it's the same deal here, only there's a penis in there too, which probably isn't so bad...

40. Sing to him while you give him oral pleasure. The lower the notes the more vibrations he'll feel and, believe us, he won't care if you're in tune or not - it'll feel great.

Okay, this one I have heard about, but: Do people really do this? What would you sing? Hm. Okay, I think I feel another list coming on: Top Ten Songs to Sing While Performing Fellatio". Stay tuned, kiddies.

43. Go ape to improve your sex life. Gorillas may have tiny penises (less than 3cm long) but they make up for it with hours of arousing mutual grooming. Doing this releases pleasure-inducing brain chemicals and makes great foreplay. Have your man wash your hair or ask him to rub your body lotion in. Or offer to scrub his back while he's in the bath. Who said sex had to be dirty?

44. Seals bite each other during sex and it seems there's good reason for it. 'Gentle biting brings blood to the surface of the skin,' says sex expert Petra Boynton, 'making it more sensitive to touch.'

45. But avoid biting like a mink. These furry creatures also enjoy a good nibble but, sometimes, the males get it wrong and accidentally pierce the female's brain, killing her. Use a code word during sex to indicate that something is hurting or unpleasurable. Choose a word that you wouldn't normally say during sex, such as Coventry for example.

Okay, was I asleep in biology class? I need to take an animal sexuality class. Three more things I didn't know. Gorillas has small weiners, seals are into S&M, and male minks sometimes PIERCE THE FEMALE'S BRAIN DURING SEX. Dear God.

Ugh. Wah.

For some reason, I've been pretty gloomy all week. I would attribute it to PMS, but that's still 2 weeks away. I'm just having one of those weeks where nothing is going right. I woke up this morning with tunnel vision (heralding an upcoming migraine), and then poured out a bowlful of chunky, soured milk on top of my Special K.

About 15 minutes later, now late for work, I sat quietly until my vision returned, only to be replaced by this bastard of a migraine. So I'm spending the morning mindlessly pressing buttons, trying to look busy in case someone walks into my office. This actually frustrates me more than it should because I was working like a demon yesterday, and thought I'd be able to continue my streak today. No dice, though.

Last night, my dryer started quitting out on me, too - as if doing my laundry wasn't already a marathon in patience. None of my 3 loads of clothing dried completely, but were warmed up so they all felt sort of warm and wet and gooey. They're currently drying on my drying rack in my living room, but I got a sneaking suspicion that Sexy may have her way with it in my absence. She tried last night, but fell through the slots, so maybe she's learned her lesson.

I'm not sure if any of you frequent my links on the right over there, but have any of you gone to WilWheaton.net recently? He's gone all pussified on me. I used to enjoy reading his blog but not all he writes about is how great his life is, how much he loves his wife, and how happy he is to be a dad. I'm sure he's a great guy and all, but please 1) You're a celebrity; no one cares if you're happy - unless it's drug induced and 2) Stop trying to plug your damn book: If I wanted to read about a child star who looked a gift horse in the mouth, I'd read MacAuley Culkin's biography. At least he did heroin.

Things I like (in no particular order):

1. Mr. Wonderful.
2. Sex (well, that was a given, right?).
2 ½ . #1 and #2 combined.
3. Worther's Originals Chocolates.
4. Gel pens.
5. Blogging.
6. My new bedding.
7. Re-reading old emails.
8. Coffee.
9. Vocabulary.
10. Aveda hair products.
11. My eyebrows.
12. The future.
13. Being cold.
14. Shopping.
15. The Internet.
16. A good ear-cleaning.
17. Water.
18. Waking up next to someone I love.
19. Sexy. She's crazy, but cute.
20. My mother's lasagna, turkey soup, and pasta salad.
21. Having the giggles.
22. Bras that fit.
23. My portable DVD player.
24. My new Ikea bag.
25. My friend Caitlin, for making me feel good about a lot of things.

Inspired by a rather foul mood yesterday, I bring you this list.

1. Fitted Sheets.
2. The same commercial twice in a row.
3. Things stuck in my teeth.
4. The dusty stuff at the bottom of the cereal box.
5. Black flies.
6. Celine Dion.
7. Vinegar.
8. Pickles.
9. Loudly ticking clocks.
10. Bad breath.
11. Heat Rashes.
12. Using "u" instead of "you" when typing.
13. "I could care less"
14. Diarhea.
15. Unreturned phone calls.
16. People who work as telemarkers who can barely speak English.
17. Student loans.
18. People who talk through their nose.
19. When cashiers put the paper money in your hand before the change.
20. Bad customer service.
21. These weird dry spots on my lips.
22. Tardiness.
23. Not being able to see movies in theatres.
24. Mike, the bus driver to the city.
25. Rotten spinach.

Everyone, please welcome back my sistah to the blogging world. She's been gone for a while, but she's back and fiestier than ever! Go over and say hi. We're still working out the kinks, but stay tuned!

. . . This bed is on fire with passionate love
The neighbors complain about the noises above
But she only comes when she's on top. . .

Yes, I did have a good weekend, thanks for asking.


First of all, let me get this out of the way:

Worst business name ever.

Anyway - the weekend.


Thursday morning (my birthday) my boss and I drove down to Truro for our meeting. We got there late because.. well, for a variety of reasons, but it didn't hinder anything too much. I could get into what happened at the meeting, but it really isn't all that interesting. However, I was given a few tasks, so I feel a bit useful.

I took off, with my giant, 100 pound suitcase, to the train station. There were about 50 small children who also boarded the train, but they had their own car, so my impending homicidial urges were avoided.

I arrived home to flowers from Lisa, and my father. As soon as he saw Lisa was around he took off and made her drive me home. Jerk. Ah well. My father has a habit of particularly bad parenting on my birthday (most notable: On the actual day of my birth, he went fishing with his buddies. Okay, it was Father's Day, but, c'mon. I should be gift enough.)

After good food was PRESENTS! No kayak, AGAIN, but I did get a coffee table, which I've been desperately needing. I currently use a Tuperware storage bin for a cofee table/automan. I also got some patio chairs, for my.. uhm, patio. All of these are still back home, though, because I could bring neither on the train back with me. I'll hopefully get them sent up soon enough, though. *cough* *cough*

Thankfully, Thursday night I was granted freedom. My mother had initially barred me from any other human contact aside from her and my aunt. However, seeing as how they were playing cards with my father, and I was downstairs watching TV by myself, she felt pity for me and allowed me to spend the night in much more hospitable quarters.

Friday was a busy day. I had lots of errands to run, and only a set time to do them in. First (and most important, ha) was to get a mini-pedicure because, apparently, my feet were in bad shape. Then, it was off to PPT to visit all my seniors I used to work with/for. It was nice; I sort of felt like a minor celebrity. Actually, I was surprised how many of them remembered me, seeing as how old a lot of them are. It was then off to get my hair colored - always an enjoyable, yet expensive, experience. Then it was to UW. They were cute - they had a cake and card for me, even though I don't work there anymore. Again, I must say I did feel like a minor celebrity. The big news there is that the ED resigned, and will be gone by the end of the summer. I don't know what that means in terms of me going back there, but I guess we'll see.

Eventually, I did make it home. By this time, but sistah had arrived from Ottawa. Girls night had begun. We ordered pizzas and got started on manicures and pedicures. My sister and I played the roles of the little asian women you see in the mall, and my mother and my aunt played the roles of rich trophy-wives. Ha. Anyway, we put on the last coats of polish by 1am.

Hm, I feel I'm babbling a bit, so I'll leave out some of the more minor details for the rest of the weekend.

My aunt became a married woman at 3:00pm, Saturday, June 19th. It took all of 10 minutes. She looked like she was going to burst out laughing at any point. For those of you who don't know, our family isn't very good at being serious for any length of time. We're weird, but I also like to think that we're usually pretty fun to be around.

We spent the afternoon waiting for supper to start. Once again, my belief that little boys hate me was reinforced. I don't know what it is about me, but I just can't seem to connect with them. Little girls seem to like me, but little boys are afraid of me, or just don't like me. It actually upsets me a little bit. I'm afraid I'm going to have boy babies and I'll completely alienate them and they'll become feral or something....

What was I saying?

Oh yah. Wedding. Good time was had by all.

Saturday night was delightful, despite a bit of a temper tantrum and subsequent rearraging/destruction of furniture. Hm. That sounds much worse than it was.

Sunday: Jean's Restaurant, Chapters (ugh), then off to Toys R' Us to get KITES! I loved kite flying when I was a kid. Granted, I wasn't very good at it (as was the case in most things I did when I was a child), but I loved being able to connect with the sky via a piece of string. We spent the afternoon flying our kites, then it was back home for an old school family BBQ.

That's about it, more or less, but this is a giant post, and none of you are really that interested, right?

My birthday is tomorrow!

I kind of feel strange about this birthday. I think it's because of the lack of fanfare this year. There's a lot of other stuff happening when I'm home this weekend, so this milestone is going to be more like a milepebble. I don't feel like I'm complaining about this, because everything else that's happening this weekend is pretty exciting.

I really liked being 24, so heading into 25 is sort of scary. Twenty-five sounds old, at least to me, right now. Okay, it doesn't sound old, but it sounds like I should know what the fuck I'm doing with my life.

Then again, I know people many years older than I who still don't have it together. I guess, all said, I'm doing okay.

Okay, you know what I think it is? I wish I could just have a big frickin' hoopla and get right wasted - a big Eff-You to the aging process. Something to make Terry and Dean proud.

Instead, though, I'll be at home with my mother and aunt, probably playing Cribbage. Yikes.

..................................

Anyway, enough whining. I meant to mention my early birthday kidnapping that went down last weekend. Vicks came down Thursday night. She played with Sexy and we otherwise just chilled out. We got up early Friday morning and drove to Aulac where we met up with Lisa. After the obligatory milkshake, I was blindfolded and taken out to the middle of nowhere. It turns out the middle of nowhere was right beside this bad boy.

So, we hopped on the bridge, and made our way over. At this point, we had nowhere to stay, so we stopped at the first place we saw and got a room. Then, it was off to Rainbow Valley! I loooove amusement parks, and I remember loving the Valley when I was little. We got there late, so we only had an hour and a half to squeeze in as much fun as we could.

They have a tilt-a-whirl there now! We rode that a few times, only to cause quite a stir when everyone in the park started looking at us because we were screaming so loudly and profusely. The kids on the ride were way too cool, and kept giving us weird looks, but we had fun, and the ride operator loved us.

Did you know that Rainbow Valley has a Monorail? Despite our safety concerns, the operator allowed the 3 of us adult ladies onto the little cart together, as we rode around the track. As you can see by this picture, the monorail is suspended above water. As you can imagine, being in a children's sized cart, 20 feet above a murky lake, and feeling the cart leaning this way and that was a little unsettling. So, of course, more screams. The operator loved us though.

Next was the maze. We started going through it and the monorail operator, from his perch above the maze, started yelling out directions. I, being rather distrustful of strange men who work in amusement parks (blame Bill Lynch) decided to go the opposite way, only to find out he was being honest. He tried again, and we believe, but the bastard tricked us. Ah well. All in good fun.

After supper (gross) we headed back to our hotel for facials and the Family Guy. The next day was spent driving around trying (unsuccessfully) to find kayaks. It was still a fun day, though. We got back to Moncton around 9-ish. I got dropped off to collect my 2nd half of my birthday gift which was 24 hours of quality time with Mr. Wonderful. He gave me Volume Two of the Family Guy (which I can't help but think was perhaps slightly because of it's ease of sharing/borrowing). Anyway, 24 hours turned into 36 when Lisa and I had to turn back on our way back to SH. However, all's well that ends well, right-o?

Anyway, this will be the last post until Tuesday, probably, though I may get a chance to post tomorrow night from home. Have a great weekend, my dear readers. \m/

Like mother like daughter?


Okay, my cat rocks. I swear to you that this is a real picture. Ha. It's too perfect.

Okay, enough swooning.

So, I went away for the weekend (more on that later). I asked my boss to take care of Sexy for the weekend. Unbeknownst to me, she brought Sexy into the office yesterday afternoon, for a photoshoot apparently. Yesterday, at about six, my boss and Amanda (my favorite co-worker who is, yargh, leaving at the end of the month) stopped by. My boss put on a serious look and said that Sexy wasn't very good while I was gone, and got into some trouble. She then presented to me a copy of this picture, with the appropriate captions. It's probably just because it's my cat, but FUCK, that's the funniest picture ever.

So, I guess I'm being kidnapped this weekend. Vicki is coming down tonight, and I guess we're going to meet up with Lisa tomorrow, apparently. It all smells kinda fishy to me, but then again, it always smells like fish here. Ha ha.

For those of you who have lots of time on their hands, I recommend joining the J.D. Power and Associates WebPerspectives Panel. You'll get an email every once in a while asking you to participate in a survey. Usually they put your name in a draw if you complete the survey. Every once in a while, though, they'll have special surveys, and sometime they'll pay you. I think I received $5 or $10 before from them, and I just did again, today, so I just made a cool $10. Also, they asked me to participate in this other survey, which requires them to ship a Palm to me so I can record my beverage consumption for a couple of weeks. Then, after I ship it back to them, they'll send me $60. Sounds fair to me!

Okay, so, 8 more days until I turn 25. I really don't need anything, but here's a list anyway in case you're stuck for ideas, or rich.

I'm been trying to possess this thing for a few months now. It's cheap, so please buy it for me.

I'm actually surprised I haven't bought this for myself yet.

Something else I'm surprised I didn't get to yet...

This would be quite handy...

Oh, and I'll take one of these, please...

How did I end up with a cat? I'm not really sure, but here she is. Sorry for the quality. I tried taking pictures of her with my webcam. Do you have any idea how hard it is to get decent pictures of a fast moving object with a crappy webcam? It's very difficult, as is evidenced below.

I got her yesterday morning. She didn't really like me much at first, because she had 3 homes within two days, so she was, understandably, probably a little pissed. I left her in the porch, because I didn't want to let her have free reign of my house without my presence.

When I returned home after work, she was curled up in a corner of the porch. I sat out there with her for a few minutes, letting her get used me before she went through my house. After I opened the door, she went through the house, and seemed pretty pleased. Woo. I still wasn't sure if she liked me though.

By about 7 o'clock, while on the phone with my mother, she curled up in the crook of my arm and dozed while I pet her. I think she's in love. \m/

She learned how to jump last night, too. At least, I think she learned. She would cry to get up on the futon with me, and she would try to get up, but fail. After a while, though, once she got the hang of it, she was a frickin' Mexican Jumping Bean. Also, she managed to get up on my bed, which I really was surprised about. My bed is TALL. Even I have trouble getting into it, I have probably a good 5 feet on the kitty.

So, I have a new bedmate. She really likes sleeping with me. I just have to used to the CONSTANT PURRING. I suppose there are worse things to get used to. Like farting.

Which reminds me; my boyfriend is back. Hoorah. \m/ x 2.

So, everyone - meet Sexy.


Here she is, discovering the window...

She's the dark spot in the lower right hand corner.

Were you a Keener? I was!

Jana sent me this link today! I was so excited about this! I loved Camp Cariboo when I was a kid. I even started a secret Keeners Society. I think it may have lasted a week (I think I eventually disbanded the society because, well, we called ourselves keeners for chrissakes, so we were fairly quickly ostracized). We would start and end the meetings with the Camp Cariboo Credo. I can't remember the words right now, and I don't have speakers on this computer. So, if anyone can listen to the wav. file, and post the words in the comment section, I'd marry you!! I only remember the last few words that go with the cariboo hats.. "Off, On, LOCKED!", and then a bunch of high-pictched titters from the Keeners.

I was checking out that site, and those two guys are actually teachers. One of them is a psychology professor at McGill, dontcha know.

Am I the only person who loved this show?

Hm. Bored, bored, bored. It's Friday afternoon, and I'm too antsy from my parents impending visit to do any real work. I've been going through the archive at LYD, but there's only so much gay-asian ranting a straight-Canadian girl can take, y'know?

My return to Lavalife has been somewhat uneventful. Lots of old men, of course. Lots of fetishists, too. And s/m folk. Interesting to talk to, but, like LYD, there's only so much I can take. I've learned a few words I didn't know before, so I guess I could consider that research, which alleviates some of the guilt I have for doing it at work.

Also, I've concluded that almost any girl that calls herself bisexual, or interested in an encounter with a couple is probably a 12 year old boy. Or a 62 year old man. Actually, if it weren't from personal experience, I don't think I'd be entirely convinced that LL wasn't a clearinghouse for the sexually disturbed..

But I digress..

Rereading that paragraph, I think there are about half a dozen double-negatives in there. Sorry to all the English types out there.

.......................
(new topic)

I decided to order a bottle of champagne for my parents room tomorrow night. I told them I wasn't getting them anything, but I just couldn't help myself. It's their 30th anniversary, and I initially wanted to organize an event for them, but with moving and everything, I sort of forgot all about it. So, alternatively, I will get them drunk and horny.

As an added bonus, I mentioned my plan to my aunt, who joined in on the fun and ordered them some flowers for their room. Very cool.

Oh my god. I just got the best link from Jana. It deserves it own post.

I spent a few hours tossing and turning last night. Part of it was missing my man, and the other part was preparing for my parents arrival tonight - did I hide everything that needed to be hid?... don't forget to call the hotel... don't forget to make reservations for supper... did I remember to clean the toilet...

Amidst all this tossing and turning and missing and worrying, I did eventually fall asleep. I dreamt that I was on a train. I've been on this train a few times, in my dreams. It's approximately 3 times the width of a usual train, and at the back there is a lovely lounge with a full bar, and lots of comfy seats.

Anyway, in my dream, I make my way (as I usually do) to the 'lounge' car. Who do I meet there? Mr. Banderas himself, looking smashing, as always. I cozy into a seat beside him. We drink and talk, and he falls in love with me. Woo. I think we made out for a while. Antonio is a very good kisser, as I recall... those Latin lips.. yum.

Fast forward a bit. Somehow, I am now to become Mrs. Banderas. It's being held in some strange courthouse, though they decorated the room to look like the train (how sentimental...). The ceremony gets underway, but I look up and I realize that this once beautiful man is all haggard and ugly. He tricked me, somehow. Also, somehow, some sort of finanacial shenanigans happened that involved his sister, which left me penniless, alone, and Bandera-less.

Penis Explodes. Enough said.

What I think I look like (as a bunny/woman hybrid, obviously...)

What I actually look like, as of last night, without my glasses on and without the bunny ears...

I did some online banking today. I had to transfer some money, and see if I had any money left at all to transfer. I looked at my chequings account, and there was a service charge of $35.00. That seems a bit much, doesn't it?

Typically, I would probably resort to apathy and leave things as they were. However, I'm having a particularly proactive day, so I give my good friends at CIBC a ring-a-ding.

Apparently, my banking is all buggered up. My 'real' chequings account is in my savings position, and vice versa. It's a bit complicated to explain here, but the final result is that I was getting fucked up the ass in service fees.

After a few minutes on the phone, though, the customer serve rep and I sorted everything out, and now I'm only paying $12.95/month for all my banking fees (which still sucks, but it at least less than that I was paying). So, I can't help feeling good about this. This is actually a visible savings on something that isn't really visible. What I mean is, I don't think anyone really considers fees into their budget. At least, I know I don't.

Oh, another thing. Did anyone else watch Prom Queen last night? I called my mother halfway through the movie to let her know that the actor who played the lawyer in the movie (Scott Thompson) once kissed me, on the lips. I keep wanting to write him. I know I could convince him to switch teams. He just needs a little convincing. I figure, I managed to turn a few boys gay, it can't be that hard to reverse the field.

Mr. Wonderful is going away for a week. Wah, wah wah. This really shouldn't be that big of a bother, as we currently do not live in the same city, let alone province.

However.

I've grown accustomed to his voice. I've developed a hump in my neck from talking on the phone every night. I just got my phone bill, and my long distance savings (because I have unlimited long distance) is currently past the $4000 mark (in 5 months). So, now I have this week-long void in my evenings, with no Survivor or American Idol in sight (Although, I think Canadian Idol starts tonight, and the Miss Universe Pageant is tonight, so that takes care of one day).

What to do?

Jenn's Top Ten List of Things to Do This Week Because She Has No Outside Interests and Therefore Has No Real Hobbies to Speak Of

10. Watch gastly amounts of TV. sigh
9. Work on a novel I've been writing for several years now. I shall let insanity be my muse.
8. Develop my master plan for overthrowing Sue Johanson.
7. Cook and clean. Damnit.
6. Use up those 12 free credits Lavalife gave me because 'they miss me'.
5. Talk to my mother 3 times each night.
4. Berate myself for calling my mother 3 times a night.
3. Find some quality porn; let nature take its course.
2. Count down the days to my birthday (fyi: 17).
1. Make harassing phone calls to all of you people (alternatively, please call me. We can discuss what I tit I am.)